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Several men explained that their marriages did not have as much sex as they wanted, and while they wanted to remain married, they also wanted to have more sex. My findings revealed several reasons as to why straight men have sex with other men. So why would they have sex with other men? The majority of men I interviewed were primarily attracted to women, not men. Skirting around cheatingĪs part of my research, I spoke with 60 straight men who have sex with other men, and specifically looked at men in rural areas and small towns. It involves two related but separate issues: first, why men identify as straight if they have sex with other men, and second, why straight men would have sex with other men in the first place. This finding represents a disconnect between identity and behaviour, and researchers from around the world - in the United States, Australia and the U.K. Large nationally representative surveys show that hundreds of thousands of straight American men - at least - have had sex with two or more other men. In my book, Still Straight: Sexual Flexibility among White Men in Rural America, I investigate why some men who identify as straight have sex with other men.
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When a straight man has sex with another man, however, he views himself as straight despite his sex with men. He is not open about that identity, likely because he fears discrimination. When a closeted gay or bisexual man has sex with another man, he views that sex as reflecting his secret identity. And these people are not necessarily “ closeted” gays, lesbians or bisexuals. Many people recognize sexual fluidity, and some even identify as “ mostly straight.”įewer people know that some men and women have same-sex encounters, yet nonetheless perceive themselves as exclusively straight. Sexual identities and sexual behaviours don’t always match because sexuality is multidimensional.